MAB, I don't know where you were having a rough time in the site, it must have been in a part I have not been checking. If you haven't thought of this already, one of the reasons you might be hearing people point out issues is that people see THEMSELVES. Because they are learning in various stages to love themselves (or love themselves more effectively), they are trying to share that with you. There is no doubt in my mind that there are people in recovery who would not be a match as a friend outside of the context of recovery, they just don't click. But I see people wanting to help all the time in a recovery support context because they see more deeply and can be a friend after all. Maybe you have not come across those people yet. The way you are talking, you are putting yourself in second place and the part about your father worshiping your brother kind of underlines that. Put yourself in first place. You will do that when you recognize being off the drug is the most important thing you can do. If you want to, post more and you will hear good reactions.