Thanks Jack. Miss interesting question, I think that is worse of course, but XABF hasn't brought his GF to the office lately and I still feel bad, so its not only the GF. Ugh! I feel I am giving CPR to a corpse thinking about this. Well, I'm off home to get ready for my night out! I will ask BF if he would like to go. We have to decide because on Monday we would need to pay for the meat etc.
Also.. I've received some compliments lately and I'm feeling like "yeahh finally XABF will SEE MY bf and he will see me finally not a zombie and living my own life and happy and I'd enjoy that" another ego filled attitude I dont like or want for myself.
UGH! perhaps.... whatever feeling then, if it gets too much I can say I need to feed my cats or something and leave and work on my feelings... perhaps that's better than avoiding things, maybe he/they don't even go and I'm fretting for nothing just like the other times.
THEN AGAIN there will be other social meetings perhaps with more time and healing these kind of things become a non issue and when I dont even mention them here in SR its my sign that Im prepared. But.. how will I achieve that if I dont face reality?? I am having issues as you may have noticed LOL, separating No contact from Hiding Forevermore.
Now I will take my own advice and ask myself: what decision would give ME more peace???
PS Im so happy Im going out and I dont have to worry about how much others will drink! *****!!