Jay I am on day 4 and new to this as well. I drank for 14 years and I have tried quitting several times before, but this time I admit that I need more than willpower. This site is a start for me. Best of luck to you. I am struggling with the same feelings as you currently. Whatever emotion I was feeling, happy, sad, good or bad...it was all better when I drank. It was like my reward system I guess. That is the hardest part. This site is great and the people are the best that I have ever seen on any forum! This site gives me more hope than I have ever had.