Hello from a past twit.
You know that game, of "three in the bed, and the middle one said, "roll over". So they all rolled over and 1 fell out".
Well when alcohol is involved in a relationship, life becomes like that game. When the A and his drink "roll over", guess who it is that falls out?
I have fallen out so darn often, I still have the bruises from hitting the floor. I kept on climbing back into bed, only to keep hitting the deck.
I'd whinge, moan, bellow, plead and go thru all I knew to stop being turfed out of bed, and nothing worked.
It continued....climb in...roll over....bump...ouch. Repeat every night.
Took years to discover that the way not to be thrown out of bed was NOT to get into it in the first place. To go get a bed of my own, and let A and his "lover", (beer) have their bed to themselves. Haven't found myself on the floor since I did that.
In other words, remove myself from the situation I hated, and be where I was happy and safe, where my boundaries weren't crossed and I was not hassled, blamed, abused and insulted by a drunk.
As for my kids, they were adults when I left my late XAH, so I didn't have the responsibility of protecting them from some drunk's offensive words or behavior, but I know from other events in our life that, I would have torn anyone apart if they caused my kids any distress.
This man is not a role model for your kids, or a partner for you, as he is far too much a self centred drinker. How much of that "Good" 85% of the time together, is because you do all you can to make him happy and how much of it is his effort?
I hope you soon decide to stop climbing back into the bed.
God bless