What about establishing a little home for yourself and your children?
With regular hours, clean surroundings, and time to focus on you after they go to bed?
Other than the clean surroundings (working on it!), that is what I have going, and it is simply lovely to have the evenings quiet once they all go to bed. I think the tranquility has contributed significantly to my growth and to a more restful state of mind.
Break up if you want to, or just move out and still see him if that's what you want.