teke, i know your inlaws are being evasive to the whole circumstance. have you asked them for a contribution? perhaps they are not wanting to step on your toes as you are his wife and mother of his children. are they maybe, just waiting for you to ask for some small favor, monetarily or what have you? would it be something you could ask in a way that would put the ball in there court like "what is your contribution to your sons services, a head stone, transportation of the body, the cremation?" Be specific, like pick a couple of things and phrase it in an open ended question. You may be surprised.