Originally Posted by
WildWorld 
Btw, if this had happened before I started coming here and attending Alanon...I would have sold my last possession to make sure she had everything I thought she needed to stay clean. Been there, done that. I now know all she really needs is her own willingness, and love and support from others...all of which are free and there for her whenever she wants them.
Perfect description of me, the day I stumbled onto/into this forum. I could not find a halfway house for my daughter at any cost, that had a vacancy, that was not in the middle of an open air drug market and even then, it was no sure thing.
So instead, I let her come home and she relapsed hard. I gave her the choice to leave or get and stay clean and sober. She chose the latter and detoxed, at home, on her own. Fast forward, she relapsed again and chose to leave home. Shortly thereafter, she did the CT thing and is clean/sober, today.
Tomorrow will take care of itself.
In this situation, the more I tried to control her and the outcome, the less responsibility she took for anything. Letting go of her and the outcome, put the responsibility where it belonged. The rest is up to her.