First of all, thanks for sharing that with us. I imagine it felt good to get it out. I put my Family, mainly my Mom, through hell when I was trying to get Clean & Sober. I was a pro at putting guilt trips on her to manipulate and bend her to do what I wanted. I can't tell you how many times she bailed me out of situations where, looking back, that was the worst thing she could have done. I never had to face the consequences of my addiction.
The last time I was in detox, my Mom told me over the phone basically that I was on my own from there on out. The doctor at the hospital recommended that I go to a Methadone Clinic, which meant going every single day, seven days a week. My Mom told me that I was going to have to take the bus because she wasn't going to take me. Not only was she not going to take me there, there would be no more rides to Meetings, doctor's appointments, no more money handed out to keep my phone from being disconnected, if my Cable bill wasn't paid, then my Cable would be cut off. She was done playing taxi and money machine. And most of all, if I got arrested again, not to call her. Boy, was I ever pissed off! In my addict mind I thought, "Here I am, sitting in the hospital, going through detox again, and she's going to abandon me? She should be helping me!" I now know, 4.5 years later, Clean and Sober, that she did help me by not enabling me any longer. She enabled me all of my life. I was 43 years old and never forced to face the consequences of my disease. Funny, when she quit enabling me, I was forced to look at my issues, deal with them on my own and basically grow up!
By the Grace of God, I was able to stay Clean & Sober from that day forward. She died 10 days shy of my 4 year Anniversary. But, I was able to make living amends, to thank her for everything she did and didn't do for me. When she left this earth, she knew that I was going to be ok. And I have her to thank for that. That tough love, that making me finally own up to my responsibilities of my addiction.
I think you should follow your heart and if that means her going to a half way house in a not so nice neighborhood, then so be it. The Methadone Clinic that I had to take the bus to every day was in the worst end of town. Maybe if things weren't quit as cushy, she'll have to realize just how serious this is. If she's not staying at a posh, comfortable Sober House, then maybe this will force her to face the consequences of her addiction.
God Bless,
Judy