When I recall my now deceased alcoholic/addict coming out of rehab...he basically didn't know I existed. We lived in the same house, but took to being merely roommates. I had too much resentment at that point to be that worried about it. It went this way for four months before he passed away (of an overdose). There was no hand holding, the cute little things that couples do, it was a dead relationship for the most part. I felt very much on the outside and neglected. He was working on him - but really he was hiding more than I imagined. After his death, I found a letter he'd written the night before. And it did say that he knew I needed attention, but to be patient. I was totally cool with that. I was working on me. Sometimes, I think we on the other side get the ugly end of the stick when our s/o gets rehabilitated. We are consumed with anger, suspicion, regrets, self regret, resentment. And somehow under the mountain of negative emotions borne out of living with an addict, we must learn to understand and forgive. You are doing the right thing. Keeping your own counsel and hold your own accord. When we went to a couples counselor (which was his idea and REALLY backfired) the closing advice was "until all addiction is eradicated, the relationship is not in the stage of rebuilding trust".