Morning.
Recently sober person here. I have been craving free for weeks now which feels really good. Really surreal. Past couple of days I wanted to drink. I've been getting by with white knuckling. Distracting myself. I do have a friend who I talk to on a daily basis but we had a falling out the other night. So what does my brain do? Whenever I am feeling out of sorts (not loved, pushed, punished, angry) my addiction instantly wants to numb it. Or I love what you said, have justified anger so I can drink AT it. *sigh*
All I know is I keep going to meetings, keep reading my Big Book, keep looking for a sponsor, keep going to my group, keep sleeping and eating well and keep having faith that if I just continue to take the next sober step that things will get better.
Thanks for posting and helping me feel not so alone. ((hug))