Qazqaz, I can relate to your feelings here. I bet a lot of us can. We can stand back and review our relationships and if we are honest and pretend it's a friend's life and not our own, we know exactly what we'd want for our friend. But for us, somehow something is different. There is something so baffling and magnetic about men like this. I am trying to figure this out for myself.
What do you think it is?? I am wondering if it's the fact that someone allegedly turning down a life-changing path chooses US as a companion...in their darkest and most serious challenge in life, we feel the bond created by them inviting us to help them somehow rises above the ordinary manipulator and codependent. No doubt, when we project our romantic dreams, we convince ourselves that, even if there is only the slightest chance of working out, if it DOES, by sharing this painful and significant transition with him, our reward will be a bond stronger than we've ever felt. That tiny chance for something so longed for makes it worth the risk. Makes us THINK it's worth the risk.
Anyone else have any insights?