welcome to SR, qazqaz.
I suppose you see how we just kinda jump right in ...
I was glad to read you went to an alanon meeting.
Keep coming back, as they say.
I agree that this sounds all very dramatic...
and it reeks to me (also) of addiction
and cycling
and what life is like when the disease is doing the choosing.
You also sound quite young to me?
Or this reads as if written by someone much younger than me, at any rate
something that's not hard to do as my years keep piling up...
but he seems to believe that you're someone he can manipulate....
or that he thinks you're so desperate,
all he has to do is threaten to 'go away' and you'll bend to his will or something.
I hope you'll share in your meeting what you've written here
I feel that you need a good bit of 'in real life' support as well.
I hope you'll keep posting as you get the tools and support to work this out.