Gosh, I wish I'd joined this forum before my fiance' died of an overdose. Your story is inspiring! He may still be alive, and I'd be alive too in a totally different environment. One that I created. Not created for me. !!! I admire your stregth. You are doing all the right things. Hopefully you have a friend that you can just pick up the phone and share things with. Those daily things we do like picking up the phone when something funny or interesting comes across your day.