I would suggest that you take care of yourself and remain firm in what you think is normal and then listen to her as she sorts things out. If she is new in recovery and emotions - then she has to experience them, learn how to express them, and then learn what gets her what she wants or not. It is a process.
If you are not comfortable with anything she suggests then offer her reasonable choices and let her make a decision and live with the consequence. THat is part of learning. As the partner experiencing her new journey of self discovery - is to look at what you feel and how you deal with things.
I hear you wanting things to go back to the way they were - may or may not happen. I usually think that when relationships hit bumps or fall apart it is b/c the way things usually are - are not really working if it gets you to this point. So the idea is to be open to change - and that creates anxiety as you sort out what comes next and how will you deal with it. Trying to manage your change and another's will be overwhelming.
