Thank you for the kind words ATime4Change!
The love hate relationship with alcohol is something that I have dealt with extensively over the last 10 or so years. I hate it exclusively now which is why I am quitting. I don't like the feeling of guilt I have for drinking the next day. Its ruined relationships, my grades have been affected and my body has been beaten. It is not a good thing and I just want to be well again. Not to mention the withdraws from alcohol are crucial and something that I never want to experience again. It is just not worth it.