Thank you all for your warm welcomes and sound advice. I really appreciate your support. We are planning on confronting my dad at the beginning of next month. For some of you that have similar situations, (my heart goes out to you) what is the best way to have an intervention style interaction that is less confrontational. He does not deal well with confrontation, so I am curious about strategies that could be used to create an environment where he feels safe and supported, as opposed to confronted and accused.
I know my father very well, and when he receives criticism of any type, he shuts down and becomes defensive. I want to avoid creating a stigma or an environment where he will resent us for correcting him and controlling him. I feel we need to be a bit more tactful.