Mssweetums, sometimes when we're feeling locked into our "other's" problems here, we like to reframe things this way:
What are you going to do for yourself today? What is one kind thing that you can do for YOU, to show that you forgive yourself for the crime of wanting to believe the best in people?
We learn many lessons in life......we try, we fall down, we get back up stronger and wiser.
Iif we beat ourselves up, then it just delays that "get back up" part
I am working on a new year's journaling exercise right now that asks me, "What kind of person do you want to be?" It's a good thing to ponder over a walk, a puzzle, a drive through beautiful countryside, a haircut, or something else you like doing for yourself. And it's all about you, not about him.
Take care of yourself. He has proven that he's not the kind of person you want to have in your life (abusive, self-centered, etc.) So I'd say he's on his own.
Which leaves you with you -- and this wonderful life stretching out in front of you that you can shape any way you like.
What are you doing for YOU today?