Contoling/Bullying
I know...I know...why I continue to try to explain to AH that I can not live with his drinking I don't know....but I do. He has decided now that because I have said that as long as he drinks that we are done...I am now a bully and a control freak. He believe I should live and let live. Really controling - I'd call it protecting myself from the horrible, hideous things he does when he drinking! I'd call it protecting my children from becoming just like him! You would think by asking him not to drink, I was asking him to donate a vital organ!! I know it's a disease, I know it is a sickness.....but it is still so foreign an idea to me that something could be so important to someone that they are willing to lose everything for it. Now, I love Diet Coke - but if I could never have one agian - I would survive and certainly if someone told me I had to stop to save my family I would! I know it isn't even in the same realm of alcoholism, but it just seems to stupid and beyond my understanding! I think perhaps I should being to limit my contact with seperated AH because this banter makes me crazy! I think that for my new year's resolution I am going to focus on me and my children...and making our lives happy! Should he decide to stop drinking and be a part of that so be it...if not so be it. I am going to be in control of me and my happiness! Sorry was rambling a bit, just frustrated beyond belief! (that should be controlling - i'm a teacher where did I learn to spell)