((((HG))))
I just ached for you as I read through the bottom portion of your thread..
This is such a challenging situation for everyone on so many levels...and siblings tend to react in a different ways depending on their relationship to the parent, their pain and their "role" in the family dynamic comes to the fore..
I think your concerns are appropriate; they would be mine as well...your mother is the one, the focus should be on with her medical care the priority, and it would be the best case scenario if one of you was appointed to head up her care, but as with most situations, it is never that easy...
I have been through this with both parents, and with my dad, I was his primary caregiver and liason with his medical doctors, and that worked well, even though I did not escape sibling misplace anger and fear.
With my Mom, she was 60 miles away and my sister was taking care of getting her what she needed. It wasn't the best situation, but I chose to support my sister in what she was doing, and stayed out of the way...I miss some time with my mom, but we had our time, and although it started out well the sibling dynamics got a bit sticky....
My choice was to say goodbye to my mom; she went very quickly, and let go of all the rest, and that was, for me, the best I could do..
I don't know what your position is with your siblings regarding your mom and her care...but you will encounter anger and fear, as everyone is struggling, concerning their mom...its not about you...do what you truly can to ensure your mom's best care...and let what you can't control, go..it will get crazy with or without you..
Prayers for you, your mom, and your family
