12:00 PM and SR is going down, dont do this today website PLEASE!
I am good had to stop by the store and didny buy beer the clerck looked at me like arent you going to buy anyhting else. No I just saved 4.22 on the 2 tall cans of Miller Light I usually start my day with.
So far so good, I have a lot to do which is good.
I am sure the klonapin is helpin is helping, I know it will get harder and harder as the day goes by and especially into tonight but I haveto be alcohol free or I will lose the new job I got and after 1 year and 3 month of no work and depression that lead me into this hole.
My horoscope for today (from face book that is ALWAYS right non point it is scary is :
Today it would be very easy to go to extremes to achieve your ends, Cancer, but you should do your best to find the route that is a win-win situation for the majority. You have to figure out how not to force things, especially if money is involved. Also, consider that someone who likes to play intimidation and power games is waving big red flags, and could represent trouble in the future. Your ideals and long term goals are too important to be compromised, so you need to reconcile your differences with others.
Interesting, Ill check back later, so far just hungry growling stomach but NOT hungry, lots of craving for alcohol and needles, and visions of them dancing in my head it is crazy, but I am stronget than a few pictures in my head right?
I know they will go away in a couple days, i will be back to work by then and have distractions and not worry about showing up looking like crap which in my industry is a huge no no.
No smelling of alcohol from the night before, not making it at all, or having to go theough this while trying to learn a lot of new systems and software and meet a lot of new employees and clients that aere going to be looking at me straight in the eyes and sizing me up.
Especially the employees, especially that they are all woman and like to eat their managers alive with gossip but for some reason I love what I do, and I am not going to give them anyhting to gossip about like I have in the past!
I will jsut be a boring, married mpother of 1 and they can make up the rest but alcoholic wont be one of the things I give them to say or assume.
THank you all!
Dreaming