My problem is that I am a terrible control freak and probably a little vane as well. I've been to two meetings in the last 6 months. The first one was a large meeting at noon in Los Angeles and I'm sure half of the people were drunk at the time. The rest were toothless homeless people and some of the old men flirted with me and made comments about my pretty hair. Made me completely uncomfortable. Maybe I just chose the wrong part of town. There were some folks who seemed genuine and nice, but the large group was just too much for me. I shouldn't have let those reasons stop me from going back, but it was a little scary.
The second was all women (due to my discomfort at the first one). It was okay but I made the mistake of going when I had to leave early to host a party at my house. I never made it back. Not sure why. Maybe I'll try that one again, the women were very cool. But for me the religion behind AA is a bit troublesome for me as I am not much of a believer. Right now I'm looking into SMART and LifeRing. But I've heard I should try many and see which ones are a good fit.
I know I need to do something, even if it's just being honest with myself. My life is in the crapper.