rockworm

When doing step 4 resentments, the 4th column asks us to look at our part in why we have the resentment. It is from this we have part of our amends list. If I did something that I need to make amends for, I identify the person to whom it is owed.

There are two more categories of inventory, that of fear and sex. There may be a fear, but no resentment, that relates to something you have done to somebody and you want to make amends to clear the fear.

Finally, there is the sex. Think of this in terms of people who you have harmed. It may not always be a sexual situation.

The amends list come from all three categories.

Finally, while you had no part in your father walking out, you held the anger for years. I suspect this interferred with any relationship you may have had with him. My father passed away when I was 6. There were times I was angry at him for being the car that had the accident. I was the one carrying the anger, therefore I contributed to my own spiritual illness.

Hope this helps

All quotes from the Big Book are from the First Edition.