Lisa, I'm sorry about the pain you're in, but I have tried to leave this thread without saying what I'm seeing written inside your post, and I'm sorry, but it won't let me alone until I say something.
Please consider the probability that you're in love with the IDEA of some imaginary man - even overlaying that idea on someone who PRETENDED to be someone just so you'd take care of him.
Lisa-
if you read that, written here,by someone else -
would YOU let them keep going without at least trying to reason with them?
If your best friend were about to make a decision like this,
this radical
and this .... illusory ...
... would you let her?
I can't either, hon.
The pieces you're talking about putting back together -
never existed in the first place, Lis.
The man was portraying a 'character'.
An actor.
You deserve
a real person.
And GOOD person, not some broken actor who is probably just looking for a bill payer and a steady roof. OF COURSE he loves that and doesn't want to lose it. And he knows how badly you want to believe this is 'it'...
and he's USING that.
Please take time and get some distance between your pain and what you are about to do, Lisa. Please.
This kind of act, just to avoid pain ... is not rational.
I'm sorry to upset you, it's not my intent.
Please just consider talking to someone in 3-d about this.
Find a group
get to a meeting
there's got to be something close to you.
Okay.
Sorry I had to be the one to say it.