In my family environment, I was very much alone amid the dysfunction and so I learned to rely only on me...
Having very poor self-esteem, being very sensitive and private, and feeling that I had no one, I chose to hide my vulnerability behind a defensive mask...I was too proud to ask for help, it was a sign of weakness, I thought, but underneath I was afraid of rejection...
As the years went by, and I grew into my twenties, I sought therapy, but it wasn't until my late twenties that I learned how to be okay with reaching out and letting people help me.
Now, of course, it is second nature...I know I am strong and capable and asking for help has no connection for me to any lack on my part. It is simply a matter of self-care.