yeah KJ...I'm with you sometimes the regular tools don't seem to help too much, but I'm a firm believer that when push comes to shove White knuckling it is better than the option of drinking.
Then when things settle a bit I can review what was going on prior to the urges and see if there is a way to stop the train of drinking thinking....need for escape sooner along the line.
Least...hang in there girl...we are all here for you (hug)