Artificial - Don't feel stupid. Recognize it for what it is -- the addiction.
You have no control over it. So, rather than blame yourself (which just drives you back to the addiction), perhaps try something new.
For me, I had to surrender. I surrendered to the fact that I had no control, and that I couldn't do it myself. I was finally honest with myself.
I gave my recovery over to something bigger than myself and asked for help.