Originally Posted by
coffeedrinker 
But, if the person is working a program, I think what it looks like is:
taking responsibility for one's actions
confessing when a violation has occurred, then apologizing for it
having relationships with clean and sober people
not shutting you out (depending on their personality and how much they share)
holy cow, yes. And NO recovery looks like:
denying culpability or blaming you or avoiding the topic or getting angry at you to deflect or feeling hurt at something you did to deflect
maybe not apologizing or apologizing in a weasel-y way or in a bitter way or in an angry way or in a forced way
then expecting you to just get over it.
then refusing to talk about it.
My AH is definitely in the latter camp. Yuck-o.