Hello there Cucumber, and please to "meet" you
The best people to tell you what it's like to love somebody who is going thru treatment is people who have done that themselves. That would be members of al-anon meetings. They understand the feelings you are going thru the way nobody else can.
I hope you don't mind, but I took the liberty of reading thru all your posts and I see that al-anon has been suggested before, so I won't repeat what others have said.
Originally Posted by
Cucumber2Pickle 
... If you know somebody who is currently in treatment - has their attitude, behavior or anything changed? .....
I've known hundreds and hundreds of people who have gone thru treatment. It's not the _treatment_ that changes them. All they get out of treatment is a bit of education about their disease and an introduction to some local meetings of AA. What _does_ change them is their own _willingness_ to follow a program of recovery and stick to it.
Originally Posted by
Cucumber2Pickle ... did they ever lapse and if they did, did they go back to the way they were?.....
Some do relapse. Some don't. There's been decades of scientific studies done on alcoholism and relapse, and there's mountains of books filled with statistics. If you're really interested I can give you links to all that. However, if you are like me, then I guess that the only thing you're interested in is whether _your_ boyfriend is going to "get it" and sober up.
That's why you hear the slogans "One day at a time", and "Focus on yourself" repeated so much. It's because _their_ recovery is totally in their hands. All I can do to support a loved one is to get involved in al-anon and make sure I am focused on _my_ recovery.
The way I see it, recovery is just like a partnership. If both partners are each giving it 100%, it will do well. But if either partner slacks off, then the whole partnership will fall apart.
Originally Posted by
Cucumber2Pickle ... But Im also wondering what I have to look forward to.....
The details of the treatment are different form one unit to another. Some don't let them out on weekends, some do. Some have intensive family programs every evening, some only on weekends, some not at all. Give them a call and ask them.
Whatever you decide to do about al-anon, keep coming back here and listen to the other people here on SR who are living with an alkie, whether in recovery or not. What I found helped me the most when dealing with my pill-headed ex-wife was to _not_ do it alone. Doing it alone is what was making me crazy. Sharing my fears and confusion with other people who had lived what I was living made all the difference, and saved my sanity.
Mike