failure.
I have no control. I went on a binge off drink, heroin and coke. come down yesterday was massive but couldn't physically move. today i tried not to drink or use and failed. i'm not wasted like i get but my body aches, i feel all fluey, even my eyes itch. I don't know why i can't stop. i couldn't see my drug worker today but she's rearranged for friday, and i see my drink worker thursday. i don't know if i have an addiction or if i chase the feelin to stop me feeling ill, sober me up, stop the pains, and stop the thoughts. I don't know and i don't actually know what I need to do stop, or what questions i should be asking...where someone says how i can help, the honest answer is i don't actually know and i guess why i can't seem to get help. sorry