Doggie power.??
I thought I would share this, as it was quite a moving moment for me today.
I've been out working building fences, something I'm new to, but good stuff. Anyway we finished today at 1pm - got home, and the whispers started. Thought to myself, must get out, take dog for a walk. I do this 9 mile walk which is a big circular walk from my place.
Soon as I'm outside it starts in my head .....
"What is all this ******** with the AA .??"
I pull myself back and say to myself - hang on mate - I want to get better.
But my mind is off ......
You're a tosser if you can't drink
You like a drink
Get out this afternoon and have a good **** up (booze up) etc etc.
I'm getting really really frantic with this knot in my stomach, this row going on in my head. I'm at that point - pass or fail. Knife edge stuff - one more resentment or bit of anger and I think I would have cracked. This goes on for about two miles, and we get to a spot where Boo-boo (my boxer) always scampers down a bank to get a drink from the stream and bounce around in the water for a bit. I'm standing on the top of the bank - just about to say F*ck it, I'm going for a beer.
She comes back up and looks at me as if to say "What's up bud.??". Well it hits me straight between the eyes (or ears).
I was going to go home, drop the dog off, wash, change, get money, get cab, sit in a bar and drink myself into oblivion (as I always have, and always will do if I drink) when there is something as simple to enjoy as a dog having fun in a stream, on a beautiful day, in gorgeous countryside, surrounded by nature everywhere ......... killed that drinking thought stone dead.
I don't know exactly what happened today, but just that simple scene saved my butt. I am so grateful to have been there at that point to shut up that side of me which in all honesty, probably would have had a drink.
I’m putting that one in the ammo pouch for when I start making offers to myself that are very difficult to refuse.
I’m going to a meeting tomorrow night too.
Much love
JC