Thanks, Kelly. It's nice to know I'm not alone there. I figured I couldn't be the only one.
Part of this is lately I am sort of chronically mad at people; so constantly for about 3 weeks I've been fighting wanting to drink. I'm getting tired of it but I can't figure out what my problem is. It's frustrating and I am always exhausted from the mental energy it takes to fight off wanting to drink 24 hours a day. And the fatigue makes me grumpier and more likely to get p!ssed off about some random little thing. It's a downward spiral and I keep thinking I'll hit the bottom and it'll get better. So far it hasn't.
The good news is I'm still fighting it. 5 months off dope now, and not sure how long I've been off booze. I don't tend to keep track most of the time, it doesn't seem to help me. I just focus on continuing to resist the temptation, find some way to distract myself.