You will find a LOT of support here. I am relatively new as well. I joined in October, had 17 days without drinking and relapsed twice in one week. Am now at the end of day 5 on my "do over." When I first became a member, I didn't post much at all -- still don't compared to a lot of people. But I READ A LOT. Reading other peoples experiences, especially in the Newcomer's Threads, is a really great way to keep those awful effects of drinking too much fresh in my mind. Being that you are laid up in the hospital, and assuming you have internet access, I can heartily recommend spending a lot of time on this site, just reading about others experiences. If you feel you have something to add, helpful or just an experience of your own, please share it. I found everyone to be very understanding. Probably everyone has gone through most of what you have. Maybe not winding up in the hospital, but most of us have found ourselves at some point in our drinking careers not remembering how we got where we were. Don't be embarrassed. I care what happens to you. Please keep us updated on how you are doing. Do your best to get out of the hospital. Last time I was hospitalized (not for alcohol issues amazingly), it was such a depressing place. I couldn't wait to get out of there. Hang in there!!