Happy Monday everyone. Man, lots of catching up to do on here. I am sorry I am always so absent over the weekends. Our computer at home is in the basement, and I just never really go down there. So I don't check much on here over the weekends.
I drank again this weekend, and am paying for it today. I don't know what is wrong with me, or why I do it. I am just so pissed at myself and don't know where to turn anymore. I always have such great intentions of not drinking, and really plan on doing it. But I fall every time. I just don't know if I can do it. I just for once want a weekend where I feel good and not hung over all the time! Just ONCE! Is that too much to ask? Apparently it is!
But I am going to explore some different recovery programs. Obviously SR alone is not enough. I don't drink because I want to, I drink because it hurts to bad NOT to. The withdrawals start kicking in, and they just hurt too bad so I drink and they go away. The longest I have made it since I have started this quest back in June is 7 days. How pathetic am I?
Anyways, wish me luck as I try some new methods and so happy for all of you doing this!
BF- Sorry about the pumpkins! Someone smashed my daughters pumpkin a few weeks ago. It was a special one my Dad made for her with her name carved in it. Some kids are just mean! I did my fair share of bad things back in the day, but I never smashed a pumpkin. I knew some kid would be heart broken. I wish they would think of others before they do stuff like that.