Dilemma
I can't figure out what to do today.
I want to go to church and then to the AA meeting later on--and the timing would be perfect, even with the walking and the pieces of the route that have a bus on them. This pattern seems to be working for me so far this week, and I'm afraid to mess it up.
But I feel half miserable and listless, and I think I'm on the verge of getting sick again. If I could drive, I'd go easily. It's the half hour walk that starts the trip that I'm dreading... just because. A half hour of walking is nothing to me.
On the other hand, if I don't do these things, I'll have to face the week like I am, and I don't think I'm strong enough. Spiritually, or whatever. I want to be around people one last time before I take that deep breath and take on the next three days. The last two have been nothing but internal battles and white-knuckled determination not to succumb to drinking.
Any suggestions?