The topic YESTERDAY was "Feelings". I went to a beginners meeting and as much as there were newbies there were of course lot's of ladies with some good sobriety time.
It reminded me of what it was like for the first few months of being sober and how much I had covered up what was really going on with me using alcohol. I didn't get to share as there were a lot of hands raised but the thing I had wanted to share for the new comer was this................
Hang in there, it does get better. I also suffered so much for the first month and cried constantly. I didn't know how I was ever going to stay sober but I had a great sponsor who took me through the steps and constantly told me "I promise Caitlin, it's going to get better, I promise." And I listened, did what she told me and I really had to believe it as you hear in the rooms how much others have suffered and how they got their life back. If it happened for them, how could it not happen for me?
Two years later my life is nothing like it was then. I am sooooooooo grateful!!!! I still have my struggles and bad days but I can handle them today because I apply the steps to my life.
It also reminded me to remember that I am powerless over so many other things in my life. That I need to continue to be patient, have faith and remember that I am NOT IN CONTROL. Things will happen as they should and I have found that when I just trust the process, things are ok, no matter what.
HONESTY -- Which I think SELF honesty is so important. I believe that too often people aren't really honest about what is going on with them and that can lead to a lot of crap piling up. Step 4 and cleaning house needs to be done.
I like to think that I do the overall thing every day. Step 10 is my favorite. It took a lot of reminding myself on a daily basis to look at everything I did through out the day, what I said, how I said things, my actions and keep the focus on me.
After constantly doing that every day I find it's much easier today to keep myself on track. The steps are just natural for me and I am grateful for that as well.
Thank you!!!