Originally Posted by
transformyself 
I guess at the very least it's "engaging" and is not No Contact, which I should have in place to protect myself as it is. "
If you have the situation set up where you call him to "see" if he is drinking around the kids, and/or get no answer and have to go over to get them, I don't see how you can even contemplate "no contact". you are very far from no contact.
I would seriously revisit the custody arrangement ASAP.
This is putting you in the role of "policeman". It is way more significant than the grocery question.
I would also not leave my children with 1) an active alcoholic 2) one who can't budget money properly enough to feed them
That is just me. I would go back to the mediator if you have to in order to fix this