Thank you Freedom. Yes,
you are still relying to some extent on him financially, so any boundaries are blurred at best, no?
and we set up ground rules (that will be broken soon enough I'm sure) that when he's got the kids, if I call and he's been drinking I come and get them and they don't go back. If he doesn't answer the phone I drive over there and if he's been drinking, see above.
We set these up with the mediator.
and I know he properly feeds them, he's very good about routines and well planned meals. Oh, I guess unless he decides to drink his grocery money away because I've offered, when told he had limited funds, to give him some of mine.
Oh I"m so mad at myself for that! What was I thinking!
ANY way-
until I make more money I am reliant on him financially to some extent. In the future I won't be so stupid as to offer to give him groceries, no matter what he says.
I"m asking for some help in addressing this with him.
How do I say this to him? How do I say, "hey dumb a**, I"m not bailing you out, you have enough money to go to the bar, you should have freaking bought groceries instead!!'
Or do I have to follow through on my commitment?
I"m so frustrated!