Dingleberry - I am so sorry for your loss. It must be very difficult for you, but just remember that drinking doesn't help you grieve or deal with the pain - all it does is postpone the pain and make other things worse in the process.
You are not alone. Focus on not drinking today. Remember how good it feels to not drink.
Then, read SR, read the Big Book, call the AA hotline, go to an AA meeting, go out for a run -- do anything and everything you can to not drink today.
Keep writing posts. You will be suppported.