Here I go again.......
Well, the AH was calm this week. No threats, no crazy phone calls, no arguements, no tempers........ until last night........
I have a friend of 8 years...she is amazing, always there when I need her, does things fun with me and my kids, has bought groceries when my AH wasn't working, watches the kids for me, helps me get them where they need to go.....etc. etc......... She hates my AH and he hates her which makes it very difficult for me. She has seen the things that he has done to me since we have been friends, the way he has treated me and the kids....She has always been my support when things were tough and ............she is a lesbian. I don't care, the kids don't care........but the AH?????? HE CARES!!!!!!
He has told me that he DOES NOT want her around the kids or he will take them away from me, I kinda just blew it off. He has expressed multiple times how much he can't stand her and vice versa.
Last night my AH came to my apartment to pick up our daughter for the weekend. Well, my son has the flu and yesterday he wanted some grits and I didn't have any money or butter. So I went and got some butter from my friend, I had my daughter with me and I didn't even get out of the car. Well after he left last night I went to bed because I work 16 hour shifts on the weekend. He calls me at 115 in the morning throwing a fit because apparently he asked our daughter what she did today and she told him that we went and got butter from my friend....well that was it!!!!! He shows up at my apartment throwing a fit that I needed to either pick divorce or him, and that he told me to stay away from her and to keep his kids away from my "Dike" friend....UGH!!!! And that he was gonna get a restraining order on her....FOR WHAT????? Then he wants to know if shes at work so he can go "Whip her a**!!!!" He says, "If she wants to act like a man, I'm gonna treat her like a man." I get him calmed down and make him promise me that he isn't gonna hurt her and he goes home. I, once again, for the second weekend in a row, am at work......exhausted mentally and emotionally because of him.
A piece of me wants to just give up the fight and let him back in.......
A piece of me wants to say NO and mean NO. NO as a one word sentence. But I guess I'm Chicken Sh**!!! Why can't I do it???