(((((Free)))))
A belated WELCOME to SR. You have found a GREAT place with lots of Experience, Strength and Hope (ES&H).
I am a recovering alcoholic for many years now. I do not know if your XABF is an alcoholic, only he can decide that some day. However, his drinking and his alcohol being his Mistress is distressful to you, therefore there is a problem!
I am glad you are trying out Al-Anon. Please go to at least 6 different meetings before making decision on whether you believe Al-Anon might be able to help you.
It does sound, based on your description that alcohol is becoming if not already his master. Therefore alcohol will run his life. He will go where and do what will allow him to keep drinking. This obviously is not acceptable to you.
I am glad you are getting out of this now. You say he is 'functioning.' That is all well and good but alcoholism is a progressive disease or whateveer you want to call it, so his 'functioning' capabilities will start to deteriorate so if I were you I would be very grateful to get out now.
Please, when you are ready to sever the 'financial ties' get an attorney to help you. it will safe you much grief in the long run. Honest.
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing, we do care very much.
You will get through this and the pain will subside. There are many here who have been where you are now and we are all willing to share our ES&H in what worked for us to get better.
Again WELCOME.
Love and hugs,