Originally Posted by
cessy68 
I get bombarded with friends/aquaintences/co-workers/family, asking, "what are you doing thanksgiving weekend????"..... bla bla bla. I then get filled with rage, saddness, bitterness, anger
Yes - yesterday I left work in tears. I told a co-worker that I was looking for a great place to volunteer some time over Thanksgiving and she looked at me said - "You are so lucky - you are all alone for the holidays and so it is all so easy for you..." I barely got to the car before the tears flew....Alone and lucky and easy in the same sentence? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
People who don't know - don't know. People who don't know what it is to not have children or a spouse or parents over the holidays - don't and can't know how painful it is. The problem is I used to have the Hallmark experience when I was younger and my parents were living...The holidays were magic for me in many ways because they were filled with love and with surprise and with great moments. I guess this too is part of the recovery process for me - I have to learn to give myself my own magical moments and not rely on someone else. Hmmmm, maybe that is what got me here in the first place!
Step by step....I remember hearing on here so much about this being a process...One more painful step to take.