Well, let's see now.....4:45 P.M. Thanksgiving eve, 2007, sitting in an airport, I had just persuaded her court supevisor to allow me to transport my daughter from one state to another for purposes of rehab.
I traveled with a professional interventionist because my daughter was at high risk to bolt and back then, I was most determined to do whatever it took to cure my daughter of addiction.
I really thought, at the time, that I could beat her addiction. It was just a matter of my will and money.
That evening I checked my daughter into another rehab, her second in 5 days. I spent the night in a dingy motel across the river, in Wisconsin. Family was encouraged to share dinner at the rehab on Thanksgiving and so I did. She did not want to stay and was acting out. I eventually sought permission to run for my life and I did.
Several days later, they determined that my daughter needed more care than they were able to provide. And so it was another road trip to rehab #3, in yet a different state.
I let go of the holidays, that year. I did not decorate. I did not participate. It was just another day. Surprisingly, it was....just another day- not a pity party day, either. And the world did not end. It has changed the way I view the holidays, forever.
I did however, give the gift of serenity to myself that day and decided not to answer the phone and listen to my daughter's threats of bolting, self harm and suicide. I accepted that I had no control over her reaction and it was the begining of my own recovery.