i hate my boss (who's also my dad). he's poison to my mental well-being and he dystroys my selfconfidence. whenever i've been associated with him i've always deteriorated.
after my last spell of drinking/drugging nobody else in my family, other than my dad, offered to help me out. so i feel as if i kinda have no choice about working for him or not. i have no qualfications or real previous work experiance.
i'm been paid well and i like the job. it's just that he's not good for me and i'm already begining to undo some of the progress i'd made (eg. to relieve stress i gamble and i've started smoking cigarettes again. and i have thoughts of self harm. etc ect)
my personal depvelopment is regressing and i've become sullen and i don't talk to anybody and when i'm not working i just stay in my room. i'm extremly unhappy.
it would be very difficult for me to get another job, and i doubt i'd be able to get a job that pays as good. i don't have any accumulated money or assets.
so the question i'm asking is, if you could have only one, would you chose financial gain or personal/spiritual development? that ******* man's making me crazy
