Oh, you have no idea how much I relate to your post. I truly feel your pain (my sister is a depressive suicidal alcoholic). You said it--we can really do nothing to help remove the pain from our loved ones' lives--only they can save themselves. And that is SO FRUSTRATING sometimes. And sad. If I could count the times I've tried to help my sister... Know that you are not alone and keep posting. Sending you hugs.