Keep posting and stay close to SR if that's all you have right now. You can get through this. Urges will pass no matter how strong they appear. Tea is a great idea. Me, I'm a coffee drinker and was just about to make myself a cup. See you have friends that have been down that road and have driven the same car. Get off the insanity road and relax with a cup of tea. Do you read books or like music? Anything to get your mind off it. I like to take walks myself. You can do it. Don't give up.