Thanks for your suggestions.
IPT, yeah I may end up going for external support when I'm ready. I'm still working through a lot of emotions. Since I saw her only a few weeks ago, it's become fresh and painful all over again.
Although it was good to stay away from relationships for this past year and do a lot of reading and soul searching, I've realized that I've been trapped in my thought processes and emotions, whether it be longing for parts of the past, or punishing myself for things outside of my control.
I came upon an advertisement for a book recently called "The Betrayal Bond". Picked it up on a whim. Although I've only read a few chapters, awareness and recovering, it's probably the hardest book I ever had to read, but it really brings to light why I've been the way I've been, why so many terrible things came into my life, and how to go about restructuring things in a healthy way.
I can't stress enough how hard it was to read everything, but working through pain to be able to live a better life, and never have to relive these things again is something that's worth working through!
Thanks to all listening so far, I'm sure I'll be posting again!
