Originally Posted by
JerryBear2009 
I have a tendency to outwork everyone around me and then compensate by not moderating like its some internal justification to overdo it because the pendulum went so far in the work spectrum.
Rationalization is a symptom of alcoholism.
I am not saying this to p*ss you off. Nor am I saying that to insinuate that you are an alcoholic. However, from my own experience I played the game of moderating and making up excuses and rules and failing at my rules and modifying them for very good reasons and feeling I did "good" as well. You might be different than me. You might not. But it looks like you are playing a similar game. Moderating sucks when sticking to the plan is a struggle, this I know. Abstinence is usually the answer to that. What gets in the way of this is the rationalizing voice which really is the addict voice. It is hard to see. I lived with all of these things solidly for three years. It is exhausting.