The hardest thing for me to admit to myself was I was codependant and addicted to another person and their drama. Part of my recovery is staying as far away from the flame as possible (my A XBF) and continuously working on trying to get better and not get pulled back into the drama. My A XBF is toxic to me. He and I together were such a toxic mixiture of addictoin and codepedance that we drug each other down in the guttter. I decided that I no longer liked living down in the gutter and climbed out. I choose now to not allow anyone into my life that is in active addiction. I choose now not to allow anyone in my life that does not treat me with the respect that I deserve as a human being. I choose now not to allow anyone in my life who is a hot mess of drama and insanity. I choose now to live the healthiest, happiest, wealthiest life I can create for myself and if someone even thinks about messing on my side of the street I now kick their behinds right back across that street! Do you really want your A XBF back.....as he is in this very minute, NOT the image that you now have of him in your mind since you found out he has a job? I'd put $5 on the table that he has a job so that he can continue to feed his addiciton. It cost money to buy the booze you know! Freedom turned me on to a saying that Dr Phil has.... the best predictor of the future is the past. Do you want your future to look like your past? I hope that you can find a way to try to focus on taking care of yourself and doing what is best for you to heal. I'm sending prayers and hugs your way.