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Old 08-25-2009, 09:12 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Cowgirl1265
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: In the barn
Posts: 324
Today I realize how painful this recovery can be for me. I'm just feeling undone and overwhelmed by my emotions. Thank you for posting Step 1. I need to do some concrete work, it helps.

I "say" that I know I'm powerless over other people's behavior...and yet I still try to control, in little secretive, manipulative ways that I think no one can see, until I'm called on it or until I recognize I'm doing it. Its horrifying to realize all the ways that I have and continue to try and change my husband, my parents, my children, even though I say I have started on the path to recovery. I'm so ashamed of myself.
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