Cubile speaks true. Letting all that pent up stuff out would be good for you. And believe me, you not the first to break down at a meeting. Just go, meet people, make sure they know you're a newcomer, get some phone numbers, ask someone to be a temporary sponsor, and be sure to buy a Big Book. And if the people at the first meeting turn you off (that does happen), then try another meeting. Try a Women's Meeting if that would let you feel more comfortable. And good luck! Let us know how it went, ok?